all-consuming relationship

When in love, how do you preserve your identity and course in life? Here is the number one reason for losing yourself in a relationship: Your belief that love is something you either deserve or not! Your misguided belief leads you to counterproductive efforts to do almost anything to get love and even more to hold onto it:
You modify your identity to gain approval and love from your partner.
You hold back intimacy to protect your vulnerability.
You have a need to manipulate your partner.